“Gun professor, I’ll punch whoever
Come here lookin’ like Conor McGregor
Leave this bitch lookin’ like Uncle Fester
Question, are we bitter rivals?
‘Cause we can shoot the Ks or the fade
‘Til both of our arms get vitiligo” – Royce Da 5’9″

Yeeeeeeeeeeeeoooooooooo!! Been sick as a dog, but I’m back on my bullshit and ready to feed the people again! Today’s main slate is small, but still nice!

So…Let’s fucking go!!!


The guy who keeps the opposing team OFF THE BOARD. Picking a pitcher is like nailing Defense in NFL. It’s important. So don’t get cute. Also…when picking your pitcher, factor in, WHO IS CATCHING aka GAME CALLING/GAME MANAGING for your pitcher. The wrong call there, can spell gloom and fucking doom for your pitcher.  There are plenty of bats value wise to spice up your GPPs. I’m looking at…

P – Adam Wainright – ($6,000)Why? Simple, Ray is going to be the chalk and I want no parts in my GPPs. Small slate, gotta mix this shit up. Plus, I think Ray is going to have some bad flashbacks and struggle. But , that’s just me….and Mike  LOL

New Format:

Yeeeea FanDuel got cute and wanted to give us the option for more points…I guess. I’ll personally be rolling out catchers in these spots. Give me alllllllllllllll the #CriminalOwnership!!

C – Tucker Barnhart – ($2,200)Why? Not too many stats on the kid Brault. Buuuuut Barn is a switch hitter and is swinging the bat good. I know Folks will probably lock Baun in on FD right here, can’t blame you. But…small slate…gotta be different.

2B – Jonathan Schoop – ($2,900)Why? BvP matters! That’s all I got to say! Schoop has good ass numbers against Tanaka, Batting .333.

3B – David Freese – ($2,500)Why? BvP matters! Homer Bailey … meet your kryponite. Freese is batting .308 against his personal gas can, So have your shares.

SS – Didi Gregorious – ($4,000) Why? Batting clean up today against yet another gas can, Andrew Cashner. Ya’ll know that the Yanks have one of the most potent bats in the game right now, King Didi is my lock of the day as well as my HR cal of the day.

OF – Adam Jones – ($3,000)Why? BVP BITCH!!! … Ok, if you don’t know by now, that is the only # I like…and advocate for. Batting .333 with a handful of RBIs and a dinger.

OF – Lorenzo Cain – ($3,900) Why? MORE BVP! Cain is batting .313 with that juicy XBH at 3

OF – Starling Marte – ($3,400) –  Why?By reading THIS article…YOU KNOW WHY! He’s batting OBP .333 , handfull of RBIs and a dinger.

Utility –Paul Goldschmidt – ($4,100) Why? YARD WORK is on the schedule today! That BvP demands it!

That’s it… Simple and eaaaasy! Go out there and kill this slate!

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